Something's Missing
by May Imaginary
Summary: Near feel he is not good enough to be L on his own.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter one

Near had just finished solving another case as the new L, the rest of the team were celebrating a job well done while he sat stacking dominos. He seemed to be doing OK as L and had solved some significant cases but he felt that there was something missing. The other members and Roger were beginning to notice things too.

"Well we're off now" said Rester later that night "will you be alright by yourself?" "Yes thank you" Near replied without looking up. "Well ok" the he replied leaving the room, Roger had already gone to bed so Near left to himself. Outside Gevanni, Rester and Lidner were talking "does he seem alright to you?" Lidner asked "he'll be fine" said Gevanni "Roger stays with him." "No I mean like emotionally if that makes sense?" she said. The others stared so she elaborated "He's not the most animated person in the world, but lately he seems more listless than usual." "Now you mention it yes he does" said Rester "he used to smile a little before, albeit creepily, but not anymore". "Perhaps he's just tired" said Gevanni "I was a hard case after all." "Yes maybe" the others agree as they parted ways.

Back at the headquarters Near was by himself thinking. "Is this really all I'll do with my life? Stop one criminal only to have another turn up? Where does it all end? What's the point?" He thought to himself while stacking the dominos. "I'm alone all the time, I can't do anything for myself and Roger just finds me creepy." He dropped a domino and let his tower fall over "I was only just able to solve the last few cases" he thought "I seem to be missing something.." He got up in search of some other toys. He opened an old box and found some familiar finger puppets inside. One for Kira, L, Misa, himself and Mello, he studied this one particularly.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Wammy's House A few years ago.

"L do you plan to decide on your successor yet? Only Mello keeps pestering me" said Roger on the phone "He can be quite violent when he wants to be you know." L replied "Well he is very determined and that is a useful skill but I don't think he can succeed with that alone." "So you haven't picked him?" said Roger. L continued ignoring him "Now Near is more calculating and logical but not as active somehow…" L pondered aloud. Roger listened, L continued "I would like to pick both of them as my successors" he said. Roger replied "But they hate each other they'll never work together, well Mello hates Near anyway, Near himself seems indifferent." "I don't know what else to suggest" L replied "I'd really like them to work together." Roger sighed "Why can't you just pick Near? he gets the top marks after all". "They both have qualities that are needed to surpass me" L said "and working alone is not always the best thing. A committed suicide because of the pressure and BB became insane, we'll just have to see" he finished.

Later that same day

"I have some bad news" Roger said "I suggested they work together but it didn't work Near said OK but Mello threatened to run away of I forced him". "I see" replied L, Roger continued "I don't know how much longer I can control Mello I believe he meant it when he said he'd rather die than work with Near I don't understand why he hates him so much, he considers this house more of an institution rather than a home and as he gets older he'll just rebel more". "Please try" said L "I think he can still be persuaded, I told him what happened with BB so I think we can trust him not to do anything too irrational." "What about Near's problems?" Roger asked "he's so intelligent but he can barely fend for himself, he's improved since we first brought him here but I don't know if he can manage it" "I think there's hope for both of these boys Roger" said L "I only wish I had more time to help them" There was a noise in the background "I have to go now" L said and hung up.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The Present Day

"I need Mello" Near thought "because he has strengths where I have weaknesses and together we surpassed L and stopped Kira". "But he's dead so now what?" he asked the empty room. "L probably intended us to work together all along, but even _he_ couldn't have predicted the chaos his death would bring".

Near didn't know what to do, he was surprised to find himself crying. He needed help but there was no one left alive who could. He took a knife out of a secret place he had and sat on the floor, he placed the blade on his arm and drew a line across. He repeated this with his other arm until he was bleeding quiet substantially. This made him feel light headed and he found himself lying down with no memory of having decided to. He tried to raise his arms but found they felt heavy somehow, he managed to raise one hand and saw he was still wearing the Mello puppet. This was the last thing he saw before he lost consciousness.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The next day

Lidner, Rester and Gevanni were the first into the room. "Good morning Near" said Rester without really looking, he waited for the usual response but it didn't come. "Near?" he asked "Are you awake?" Lidner glanced over "he doesn't normally sleep here at night" she said and went to wake him. She stepped over the toys obstructing her view and gasped. "Rester, Gevanni! I need the first aid kit now!" Gevanni ran to get it. "What's wrong with him?" asked Rester, Lidner turned Near over to reveal the large blood stains, she pulled back his sleeve and found the cuts Rester put his hand to his mouth in shock, Lidner checked his pulse and breathing . Gevanni retuned "how'd this happen?" he asked, Rester found the knife "look here" he said picking it up. Lidner began to sort the bandages while Gevanni fetched Roger and Rester checked the damage. "There pretty deep" he said looking at Near's arms "they'll need stitches." Lidner began to wipe some of the blood away, Near stirred slightly. "Near, hello, can you hear me?" Rester said, Near's eyes opened but he said nothing.

Gevanni and Roger entered the room "They really _are_ self inflicted" said Roger when he saw Near. Lidner was bandaging his second arm now, "Why would you do this?" asked Rester. No response. "We're going to take you to hospital" he continued "there gonna ask the same things there so you might as well tell us now". "I don't need to go to the hospital" Near muttered "What?" said Gevanni "you're a right mess, you need sorting out". "I've done this before and I was alright" Near replied "they weren't this bad before though were they?" said Lidner who had now finished the bandaging. She let go of his hand and he checked his arms "Thank you" he said. Roger had sat down next to Gevanni, Near tried to get up but found he was still too weak to do so. "You can't leave yet, Near" said Rester "we need to know why you did this". Near just glared and tried to stand again only to fall back down, Rester steadied him. "Come on your going to A&E" he said "alright" Near sighed. Rester picked him up "I've got him" he said "you two get the doors, Lindner you can lock up". The other three left and Lidner went to lock the door, before closing it she looked around the room and saw one of Near's robot toys nearby. She picked it up put it in her pocket and left.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The five of them got in the car Near had fallen un-contiouse again.

He had a dream, he was in a bed had been woken by a gunshot and a scream. He went to investigate and it found himself in a master bedroom, a lady was sobbing in a corner and the bloodied corpse of a man lay on the floor. A masked figure stood over the sobbing woman and as Near peered round the door he could see the corpse had been shot in the chest. The masked figure was shouting "That'll be you if you don't quit blubbering! Now for the last time where is the fucking money!?" The lady just rocked herself and cried "no please, we don't have anything!" Near hid behind the doorframe trying not to panic, when a second figure grabbed him. He fought back and the mans mask came off, but he was too strong, the person entered the room. "Is this yours?" he asked the woman, she and the gunman looked looked up. "Nate" she said panicking "leave him alone, he doesn't know anything, please just leave him alone". "If you just tell us where your valuables are we will" said the shooter. "Mummy?" said the young boy "what's going on?". "Don't worry dear It'll be alright" she said with tears staining her cheeks. "Mrs Rivers I'm waiting" said the gunman "alright" she replied "I'll show you if you let Nate go". "Waddya think boss?" said the man with Near "this little one won't cause trouble, will ya kid?". He forced Near to look at him, Near shook his head "and if he does misbehave, we'll just hav'ta punish him". He laughed and flicked open a switch blade dangerously close to Near's face before letting him fall to the floor. Near looked at his mother "Off to bed now" said the first man "you didn't see a thing". He glanced back before leaving, his mum winked at him, the men didn't notice.

Near Hid in his room trying to remain calm he could hear his mothers footsteps go past the door with the two men keeping her in check. "What's mum doing?" he thought "she must have a plan but what". He heard her enter the kitchen below his room, "I know" he thought "they've probably broken the telephones but they don't know where mum hides her mobile, she's luring them away so I can phone for help".

Down below the criminals were gloating "you chose the right thing missus" said the knifeman "didn't wanna hav'ta hurt that kid, what is he only 4 years old ?". "He's 5" said Mrs Rivers without meeting his gaze "the safes through here, I need to my keys to open the cellar door though." She was trying to buy time knowing full well the door was already open but if she could just take long enough about it the police might arrive. "You tell me where the keys are and I'll get em" said the man with the gun.

Back upstairs Near had creeped into the master bedroom, the phone was in the bedside draw. He climbed over his father to get it, he was crying a little having to see his dad's corpse so close up, but this didn't stop him he could still save his mum. He got the phone and began to dial 999.

The man returned with the cellar keys, Near's mother pretended to unlock the door "it's pretty dark down there, you'll need to fetch a torch" she said. The gunman headed down the steps and took his mask off "I think we'll manage" he said surveying the room.

Near having contacted the police, crouched next to his dad he used a trembling hand to wipe his dad's dark hair off his face, "the same as my hair" he thought "I'm almost as smart as my dad too" he smiled "or as smart as he _was_" he corrected himself while tears began to fall again. His dad's face looked peaceful but pale despite the violent struggle he must have had.

In the cellar both the men were looking for the alleged safe "it's in here somewhere" said Near's mum. The men took no notice, she edged towards the exit as they searched. When they reached the far corner she turned and bolted out the room "Hey!" yelled the men as they chased her. "You were the one watching her you dick!" yelled the gunman to his colleague. Near's mother tried to lock the door but the shooting made it impossible, she tore through the house. "If I reach the garage" she thought "I could try drive away but the damn car's been playing up, and Nate I can't leave him". She knocked over furniture to deter the men "if I run I could make it to the nearest house in maybe 10 mins, but that would still mean leaving Nate alone". Near who had heard the commotion was at the top of the stairs, his mum got halfway towards him before being shot in the leg. She screamed and yelled "RUN!" Near went to his room and tried to barricade the door but he was too small and the men easily pushed it open. "You little shit!" one said trying to grab Near, he managed to cut his arm with the knife. But Near dived past them and down the stairs, his mum was still there trying to stop the bleeding. Near stopped and tried to help her "No!" she gasped "Hide!" But before Near could say anything the gunman shot her again in the chest, she fell lifeless eyes still wide with panic.

The men grabbed Near while he was still numb with shock "you've got too good a look at us" said the gunman "we can't trust you not to go telling". The knifeman got a tight grip on Near's sliced arm which made him wince, while the gunman placed the weapon to Near's temple.

It all happened so fast, Near was about to die when the police arrived. They stormed in, some shots were fired before both the robbers were disarmed but no body else was hurt. Ambulances arrived and took Mr and Mrs Rivers away, Near who had curled up into the foetal position was lifted by a police officer. "It's alright you're safe now" he said "I'm going to take you to hospital to fix you arm and.. well then we'll see" Near lost consciousness.


End file.
